Run!

Today I ran five miles.

I'll say it again, today I ran five miles.

What's that? OOHHH you ran ten miles? Oh you ran ten miles and then you saved a small child from drowning? Ohh boy and then you ran ten more? Great, seriously great--but did you hear me?

I ran five miles today.

To some, this might not be a big deal. However, to me, it feels big. It feels really big.

Why is it so big for me? Well, to put it simply, I've never pushed myself to try. Sure, I can run a few miles but every time I hit three on the treadmill I'd quit. There was no way I could do more than three. I'd walk away, not especially tired, and move on to another cardio machine or over to the weights. Three miles was plenty and there was no way I could do more.

But today, I just well--I tried. I didn't quit. I saw three on the treadmill and I kept going. I was watching the Men's Olympic hockey on the TV and was rooting for USA and I just kept going. I came up to four miles and I could have stopped, part of me wanted to, but I wasn't really tired so I just kept running. It seemed like everyone in the gym was watching the game and every time something happened a small roar erupted from the crowd and I felt the momentum. I ran all the way until five miles and JUST when I was approaching it USA scored their last goal to secure the win and so did I. It felt great--I slowed down and walked for a bit. I thought of how long I was running for and how good it felt not to quit. I thought about how much I am capable of and what it means to try.

I walked home the long way from the gym, down into the subway and I headed back home. I was really proud of myself. If I can run five miles, surely I can do more. And maybe, I could do some of those other things that you know--I haven't even tried yet but have convinced myself I can't do.

This blog, like my running, is a work in progress. I'm finding my footing and seeing where it can take me--And even just trying feels like an accomplishment.